Wednesday, April 4, 2012


     So, I had taken a break from blogging, because I was boring myself with all of the post about me "still not being pregnant", after a record-breaking 12 months of trying.

     I was ready to move on to IVF, but my insurance company insists that I try IUI, first. I have to be honest, I have never had a lot of faith in IUI. I don't know why. I don't have any evidence to back up my feelings, I just always think of it as a llllllllooooooonnnnnnggggggsssssshhhhhooooootttttt. So, I felt pretty confident that I would waste three good months, attempting IUIs that weren't gonna work.

     But somewhere during the course of being injected with multiple IUs of Follistim by my teenage daughter, and going in for "follicle checks", blood work and ultrasounds, I started to believe that maybe IUI would work for us. Maybe we would finally get our final child/ren and finally complete our family.

     I was totally hopeful, that when I started having light spotting and extreme menstrual cramps yesterday afternoon, I convinced myself that it was implantation. I mean, I was still 8 days out from when my period is supposed to start, it was perfect timing. But when the cramps returned today with even more force, and when spotting turned to bleeding, there was no way I could continue on in my denial. My period is coming....or it's here. I'm not really sure which one, yet.

     It's 7 days early. I wasn't even scheduled for my beta until next Monday, but my period decided to rob me of that opportunity. I didn't even get to make it to the place where you wonder if your trigger shot has left your body, and run through a few HPTs. I can't help wondering if I should've insisted on adding the progesterone that they told me I didn't need, to my protocol.

     This cycle was a Major bust.

No comments:

Post a Comment